Letter to myself’s before the move

Name: Venus Ariel
Age: 43
Place of Residence: Kohav Yair
Most missed: Landscapes in Costa Rica, friends and nature

April 1999

I’m going to conquer the world… I celebrated my 26th birthday a few months ago, I have a lovely child with gold curls, a great partner and another month we are moving to Costa Rica for a few years. I don’t speak the language, I don’t have a job waiting for me there, I don’t know anyone, but there’s no happier than me. I love change, it’ll be fine, I’m sure!

Aloneness? I’m a friendly person. I’ll make new friends right away.

Longing? Come visit.

My partner who lives has the kissing disease – high fever, bedridden and I am alone with the rice and the movers, sending our equipment overseas – it will not break me, I am going to conquer the world.

מכתב לעצמי של לפני המעבר
Arnelle Volcano. Costa Rica volcanoes are fascinating in beauty

We were given a surprise farewell party, but our son decided to fall on his head. Hospital, tests (all normal) only we arrived almost two hours late – that won’t break me either, I’m going to conquer the world.

My partner went two weeks ahead of us. I’m supposed to fly alone with the child, cumulatively for 24 hours – that won’t break me either. I’m going to conquer the world.

In a moment I get on the flight, suddenly “my token drops” – Mommy – am I going to conquer the world? How do I do it???

March 2017

I don’t know if it’s the young age that comes along with innocence, boldness and confidence, I can tell that in practice, after a long flight we landed in the capital San Jose and my eyes darkened. Where’s all the green they promised me?

It took a few months for me to start working, and by then I found myself thinking quite a bit about how I was conquering Israel back. Friends may have quickly found it, but the local culture was not easy to get used to. And about the longing? Due to the distance the family did not come more than once the whole stay and only a few few friends came to visit.

מכתב לעצמי של לפני המעבר
No spectacular from the beaches of Costa Rica

I’m looking at that brave “girl” today that if she had just prepared herself for the transition she would have realized that there are things under our control and to which we can usually prepare, and things that are out of our control and that are desirable to learn to contain – I would have saved myself a lot of sleepless nights and some wrinkles.

Knowing that I’m not the first, and probably not the last. And that there is a lot of knowledge and accumulated experience that can be learned towards the exit, together with people just like me who experience the same concerns, who have the same questions and especially hopes that everything will go smoothly and everyone will be good, to be in a place that can make a difference for someone, to come from the future and draw conclusions in retrospect – they are the ones who led me to accompany people privately and develop a workshop for soft landings in relocation.

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